Run #1480 What’s In a Name

One Night Only kicked that misbegotten piece of crap 2021 to the gutter and Who’s Your Daddy ushered in a hopeful 2022 for the Gypsies. Knowing what a bunch of wet blankets the Gypsies are, WYD brought the pack together at the Stowe Lake Boathouse in Golden Gate Park. The Outbeer was little late and by the time it arrived the Alcoholics Unanimous meeting was getting rowdy, what a surprise! Once the keg of Lagunitas Contents Under Fresher was tapped the animals quieted down. The silence was broken by the insane response to the trail being declared FREE, a hasher’s favorite word. It seems the less than dynamic duo Tongueless and Fits In managed to forget the Hash Cash bag so there was no way to make change, “FREE” problem solved. While the pack was busy hydrating, Tongueless was busy looking of a victim, oops, a Minister to take care of the religious needs of the pack. He didn’t have to look far since Just Ted AKA The Other Bastard proffered his pal Just Travis visiting from Portland. Just Travis filled the bill nicely as he could read, AND he said he knew Brent. Knowing what was about to happen Just Fuck Off had a grin that could light a city as she silently mouthed, “like a lamb to the slaughter”. Just Travis would have been a lamb to the slaughter if the lamb jumped on to the barbie and lit the coals himself. With the Male Missal in hand JT preached a sermon about a Brent” unlike any he knew, well, maybe not! To say that JT was getting off on his role would be a lie and not just an understatement. To get him to stop preaching the book had to be ripped from his hands! The pack was so moved by JT’s performance that even Wash This Asshole was struck dumb. Our hare missed the experience since he was laying the trail live and had left before the reading. Chickenboner filled in for our hare with the chalktalk that consisted of, “Um, he started in that direction, I think”, what more could the Gypsies ask for! Trail darted into the woods and led the pack down towards Crossover Dr. and along Transverse Dr. The Lost Patrol consisted of, well, the usual losers with the addition of Closet Twitcher who had dropped to his knees and wept at the word FREE. Only the iron control of On All 4s managed to keep Adopt A Pussy and Backside Banger from wandering off in search of food and drink. OA4s used the word “FREE” like a whip! One thing about WYD is he doesn’t waste time on concrete if he can avoid it and he always manages to avoid it. Trail skirted Metson Lake and dropped deeper into the woods before crossing MLK, Jr. Dr. where, oddly enough, it headed back into the woods. As trail went uphill Blow Queen shot by climbing the hill while hopping. Pied Piper who was sidestepping up the hill just shook his head in either awe at BQ’s fitness or in sadness in BQ’s lunacy, you can choose for yourself. Chickenboner who was with the LP encouraged the gang by acknowledging that this too shall pass. Trail once more crossed Crossover Dr. and turned uphill at the Mother’s Meadow Playground where it topped out at Stowe Lake Dr. and led the pack back to the start. The picnic table was soon festooned with Vitamin J and the Sacred Thermi had been filled with hot chocolate to be topped up from the bottle of Peppermint Schnapps. Just Tonic slipped out of his harness and headed straight for the spilled bag of Cheetos. Exaggerated Crack and Just Kate weren’t worried since like all hashers Just Tonic was too busy stuffing himself to *un off. Cuming Mutha apologized again for not having his phone so he could be tracked by OA4s. Adopt A Pussy, an attorney himself, shook his head saying that the Find My Phone app is also called the Divorce Lawyer’s Friend. Tongueless took up the Sword Of Power and weaving while waving convened the Circle. After the usual frippery Just Travis was called up for a down-down that turned into a naming. The pack settled, or so it seemed, on Brent To Own and Just Travis knelt before the Sword and rose as Brent To Own then AAP screamed no, no, no, Brent To Bone the pack went wild and the service was repeated, Just Travis became Brent To Bone, newest member of the Gypsies’ Order of the Sleepless Knights. Dr. Kimble decided that he’d over imbibed when he thought he saw a ghost but no, it was Likes To Lick in SF on business from Austin and back at his old stomping ground, the Gypsies! Manhole decided that LTL was a valid excuse for emptying the keg and it did die heroically just as WTA tried to squeeze out the last drop. It was a fine way to start the new year! Cheers.