Run #1506 Putin Attacks Gypsies!

One Night Only wanted to celebrate Jack The Ripper’s Bday, one that put him only slightly behind Methuselah, so where better to start it than in the parking lot behind the Senior Center in Golden Gate Park. The pack arrived in its usual dribs and drabs mode while the Outbeer dispensed from the keg of Lagunitas Little Sumpin’ Sumpin’. While autos were the primary method of arrival, Dick Ass Mother Fucker pedaled in on his bike wearing a full-on Ninja suit that included a wet suit. DAMF just never trusts the damn ferry to make it over from the east bay. Closet Twitcher advised him to put water wings on his bike if he was so worried. Just Fuck Off did a great “flash in a pan” impression by *unning into the parking lot to tell the pack she had a big practice test on Friday and couldn’t afford to take it hung over, then sped from the scene of the crimes to come! Just Ted Aka The Other Bastard just tapped another pint and settled in for the long haul, no big test for him. Just Joshua was back for more mayhem and when it was clear that he didn’t need to perform any religious rites he wept in thanks. In a reflection of our troubled time Tricrapalete chose to mirror Vladimir Putin as he preached from the Male Missal. ONO, who claims to have baked cakes for the Russian Premier as well as handling multibillion ruble deals found Tricrapalete’s mimicry to be perfect. So moved were Adopt A Pussy and Backside Banger that they decided to stop for a blini at the first Russian Tea Room that they spotted. On that note our hare sent the pack off in search of the marks she’d set. Once again ONO decided to cast her fate with the Lost Patrol which by dint of the hare being with them should not have been lost! Unfortunately, it wasn’t long before ONO turned to Fits In and said, “I’ve laid so many trails lately that the woods are all starting to look alike.” Trail took the pack out of the parking lot and across Middle Drive and back into the bush before crossing paths with the Dog Training Area. Manhole clung to the fence inhaling the scents, euphemism, and getting his dog fix. Trail dipped back into the woods and crossed Chain of Lakes Dr. E and back into the woods. Trail skirted North Lake for it’s required water views. When trail circuited the Archery Field, Wash This Asshole wondered if trail would go through sperm alley since he wouldn’t mind doing a little “cock robbin’”, what a great sense of humor! WTA was been thrilled when trail passed the Beach Chalet Soccer Fields restroom. Trail passed the Murphy Windmill and Hand Pump bent a knee in tribute. Trail took the pack around Chain of Lakes Meadow and the Polo Field before circling the Park Stables and crossing back over JFK Dr. Eventually the pack was back at the start and ONO could indulge them with her love of sugar and butter. The keg was tapped and Fits In provided another Sacred Bucket of Sex on the Beach. ONO is on the Most Wanted List of both the American Diabetic Assn. and the American Heart Assn. but the Gypsies worship at the door of her oven. Cheese Turd arrived late, and his eyes lit up as he double fisted the Bucket and crammed more of the cookies into his maw. ONO provided a cake for JTR that was guaranteed to put anyone who ate it in the ICU and that cake went fast. 5150 had his entire trunk filled with empty growlers that became full growlers. Dr. Kimble never worries about not remembering a growler since he uses his body as one! Tongueless may have taken up the Sword Of Power and may have convened a Circle where down-downs were dealt including to Jack The Ripper whose Bday commissioned the sugar, butter and chocolate surge! Speaking of Tricrapalete and Vladimir Putin the combo of alcohol and sugar was going to leave a lot of the pack feeling like they’d been at war…on the losing side. Still being the Gypsies, they’d feel the night before made the day after worth it. Cheers.