Run #1513 Fireman Save My Child!

Manhole laid the trail for the Gypsies, and he made it a pub crawl! Actually, that’s all you really need to know since the Gypsies on a pub crawl is so easy to imagine, too bad, ya gotta put up with this anyway…or not! The pack gathered at Front and Union aka The Hellmouth and the evening was kicked off with those waiting for the start popping the top on bottles of Lagunitas Unrefined Shugga at a mere 10% ABV. Connoisseur that he is Adopt A Pussy found the nectar to be a bit, “raw” while Backside Banger found it to be just what the doctor ordered, um, if the doctor was Dr. Kimble! Dr. K has a vague memory of this exchange to go along with his vague memory of the entire evening. As he pounded a bottle Missed Delivery heard the words pub crawl and instantly chalked out the spot he planned to be lying on by evening’s end. MD is both a guy who knows himself and plans ahead. Speaking of which, Peg Me And Lace Me took one look at the ABV on the label and said in a clear voice, “This is all I’m going to drink tonight!” Wash This Asshole thought PMALM just meant that Unrefined Shugga was all he’d drink all evening! It made perfect sense to him since he was stuffing as many bottles as he could into his clothes, why pay for booze when you can carry your own! While this was going on Six Tits A Week, a Whine and Chowder Society devotee who was last seen at the Gypsies in 2010 demurred at providing a sermon from the Male Missal so Backside Banger did and being a hasher BB knows how to deliver the goods. Okay that driver should have kept his eyes on the road rather than Twerkses Like Xerxes butt gyrating, accidents will happen! Manhole was not alone in thinking it was a good time for the pack to be off, so he sent them off in search of his intended pubs. The first bar was Vesuvio across the alley from the City Lights Book Store and site of the Gypsies’ infamous Brandy and Cigars trail. Looking quite the lads were Exaggerated Crack holding down a table and waving a pint at passersby while Yank Me Daddy leaned on his knee!  Manhole was way ahead of the pack and happily ensconced at the Bamboo Hut long a habitat for the Gypsies! Arriving there Fits In and Tongueless were the FRBs and the in crowd since they constituted the entire crowd! When the pack began catching up the bartender lit up like a greedy fire. FI and T were happily sucking down a Dark and Stormy paid for by Manhole, who stood the first round! Poor Just Fuck Off was 86ed for not having a hard ID, oh these youngsters with their IDs on the phone. Fits In offered to let JFO use her ID but the bartender insisted JFO didn’t look 75, phew, every cloud has a silver lining! Chickenboner popped for a Volcano Bowl opting for the Painkiller. Twinkle Dick barely managed to keep from getting singed as the Volcano erupted. The bowl was shifted to a table and the sucking of straws could be heard for miles around. Once the Volcano was doused the pack set off for The Saloon on Grant. The Saloon is currently the oldest tavern in San Francisco and the Gypsies didn’t do anything to lower the average age of the clientele. At the same time there was a rocking band that had the place jumping! Tricrapalete was out there shaking his booty so hard that Twerkxes was getting jealous! Dick Ass Mother Fucker was in the middle of the dancing throng although doing the Tango did seem out of place! In case you’re concerned JFO was not being carded and was feeling mighty mellow! From the door marks could be found leading to Kennedy’s where people could get food, yeah, like that was gonna happen. Actually, CB picked up a noodle plate that she brought back to the start and shared. Sweetie’s Art Bar was number 5 on the pub parade and being artsy sorts the pack was welcomed with open taps. By now FI and T had moseyed back to the start with DAMF just to find 5150 ready to start partying. They covered the Cloak of Invisibility with Vitamin J and a Sacred Bucket full of Cuba Libre, like that was really necessary! The pack, those that could manage it or even wanted to, stopped at Red Jack’s. JFO and Just Ted Aka The Other Bastard decided to stick to the Bucket and the Sacred Cooler. Our hare suggested they go to Kennedy’s saying that *unners like them could make it in 5 minutes. JFO demurred with her bad foot. T being the gent he is suggested that JTATOB would carry her if he was a real man, so to prove his undying affection JTATOB scooped JFO up and tossing her over his shoulder in a perfect fireman’s carry shot off diagonally across the street. What more can be said than drivers should keep their eyes on the road! The pack made its way back to the start and destroyed the Bucket. MD sadly fell short of his chalk outline but came very close. JFO learned to keep an ID handy. Choke Me Daddy took both Exaggerated Crack and Yank Me Daddy to safety! The Hellmouth lived up to its reputation with the Gypsies and the Gypsies lived up to their reputation about pub crawls. Cheers.