Run #1384 Would You Like Some Alcohol with Your Sugar and Fat?

Scarlette O’Hairy and her minion, the irrepressible Just Travis, laid last week’s Gypsies’ trail from the Immigrant Gap Overlook in the Presidio but they might as well have started at the South Pole since the cold and wind had the whole pack assuming that’s where they were! Most of the parking was along the road on both sides so there was plenty of space. Scarlette used Peteophile’s truck to reserve a space for the Outbeer and as Fits In piloted the alcohol central auto into the pace One Night Only prayed to the Hashing Gods to keep her Mercedes pristine. Pristine wouldn’t ever be used to describe Slicker N’ Snots mind and even less so after the way he checked out our visitors She Came and Bang For Your Buck from Harrisburg-HersheyH3. Since an evil mind is a great comfort S’NS was very comfortable. The keg of Lagunitas Czech Pils did nothing to warm the pack but at least they were as cold inside as outside so there was some balance. Bang For Your Buck provided plenty of heat with her sermon from the Missal With No Name. Closet Twitcher announced to all an sundry that it’s the hardest he’s been in a decade but Tongueless’ Penis, who knows something about that kind of appendage, looked at it and declared CT was more likely to get frostbite than a piece. On that note Scarlette gave a chalktalk while laughing so no one had any idea what she said which was fine. At this point in the year it’s dark at the start so a light is definitely needed especially in the woods where Scarlette of course had them but of course we’re talking about the Gypsies here so you can imagine what happened. While the pack sped off in search of marks our hares sped off to create a sugar, fat, and beer check. Trail crossed Washington Blvd and dropped into the woods. Peteophile announced that since he’d helped scout trail he knew how to get to the beer check, at least he didn’t say he had a bridge to sell cheap! Pencil Dick had Just Arlo and JA, Tongue Depressor, and Qaeda Cunt had a fine time on a sniffari through the woods. Our hares made a determined effort to stay off cement and thanks to that those torchless people had a fine time unning into trees; their periodic sheiks of pain let the Lost Patrol know it was still on trail, um, or at least close to it! Dr. Kimble was *unning a good bit of the trail and his only problem was lifting his knees high enough to clear the fallen! Apparently the beer check was originally planned to be at the Log Cabin but when our hares got there a private event was in full swing so they moved it on down the road. It would probably have been easier to have Just Travis waving a light to get the pack’s attention but 5150 thought JT’s leaping about in the nude added a nice touch to what Scarlette referred to as the “Shit Show of Shit Shows”! Our visitors were certainly awed by JT’s, um, skills. As you might imagine it was no warmer at the check and the just to add insult to frigid temperatures JT made sure the pack *an all the was down to the beach and back up. Hand Pump insisted that the covering of sand on him did nothing to contribute to any warmth. She Came and Bang For Your Buck were noticeably cold and had goosebumps on their goosebumps. They pointed out how hard the trail was to follow in the dark in the woods and every the voice of kindness Tongueless pointed out that only a fucking moron wouldn’t have a light. She Came agreed and said that their lights were staying warm in their hotel room so technically they DID HAVE lights. Our hares had an assortment of beers in a cooler as well as Halloween themed cupcakes, cookies, brownies and anything that might move your AC1 level to new and dangerous heights. They also had Just Katya appear to announce that this evening was not “Steak and a Blowjob Night” so she’d cum to the Gypsies. Lois Lame and Bitches Bitch danced a comedic pas de deux by looking for each other only to keep missing each other. Eventually even the Two Stooges were reunited. BB wept bitter tears and pounded his breast in guilt that he’d been with Pied Piper on trail and been so oblivious that he hadn’t noticed Piper’s repeated trip and falls had less to do with alcohol consumption than lack of a light. At this point Phone Sex added some comic relief by ringing T and saying that she and King Ronjon had arrived late and gone on trail only to become hopelessly lost so returned to the start and were in need of alcohol. Their cri de coeur touched even T’s cold heart so when 5150 announced he knew the fastest way back off they went to the rescue. Somewhere around Kobbe Ave. She Came denounced 5150 as not having the vaguest idea where he was going which happily proved to be untrue. Eventually the pack, all of it, was back at the start and even Slicker ‘N Snot woke up from his nap and came to drink. The Sacred Bucket was filled with River Madness made with lemonade instead of limeade but just as much vodka as ever. Our visitors not only didn’t have lights but no warm clothes either. The kindness of the pack prevailed and various sweats and jackets were provided them. Apparently it doesn’t get dark and cold this time of year in Pennsylvania. They wanted the Circle to open on the spot but the Gypsies follow their own clock. King Rongjon has been taking his curmudgeon pills in an even stronger dose so he refused to do any down-downs. Tongueless took up the Sword Of Power in his stead and conducted a Circle, of course by then our visitors had fled, um, along with the King. Needless to say enough alcohol and Vitamin J was consumed to put a bloom on the evening! Cheers.